Chains Forged in Ignorance, Binding the Ascent of Humanity
This List Could Easily be 1,000+ Insanities (Watch Some George Carlin Shows)
This List be Updated Daily
1. Reincarnation
The universe’s version of the customer loyalty program for souls.
2. Omnipresence
The ultimate flex of being everywhere at once, which sounds profound until you realize it’s basically the divine version of never logging off.
3. Holiness
The gold-plated aura of being so spiritually clean that even dust refuses to land on you.
4. Blind Faith
People who believe in absurdities will commit atrocities.
5. Apostasy
That spicy little word that means you’ve decided to unsubscribe from divinity, and everyone’s very upset about it.
5. Holy Ghost
It’s like cosmic Wi-Fi. You can’t see it, you don’t know how it works, but if the connection drops—everyone panics.
6. Virgin Birth
Because apparently, biology is for mortals, and immaculate conception is just Heaven’s way of saying: “We don’t need a dad, thanks.”
7. Trinity
It’s one God. But also three. But still one. But three distinct persons. Who are also one. It’s not math. It’s theology. “It’s like a spiritual group project where everyone gets the same grade but only one gets crucified.”
7. Holy Water
Regular water that got a divine shout-out. Great for blessings, exorcisms, or just aggressively wet hand gestures.
8. Burning Bush
Moses walks by, bush is on fire, bush says, “Yo, I’m God.” And Moses just… goes with it. No questions. This is what happens when psychedelics meet destiny.
9. The Black Stone
A meteorite in Mecca that fell from Heaven, is kissed by millions, and is said to absorb sins like some kind of divine Brita filter. “Come for the pilgrimage, stay for the rock that absolves your bad decisions.”
10. The Talking Snake
Because the first recorded scammer in human history apparently had no legs but excellent diction. “Eat the fruit, what’s the worst that could happen?” — Ancient serpent, originator of peer pressure
11. Kali Yuga
Hinduism might be the only right one, of all precepts: in Hinduism, the current era is the fourth, shortest, and worst of the four yugas in a Yuga cycle, preceded by Dvapara Yuga and followed by the next cycle's Krita Yuga. It is believed to be the present age, which is full of conflict and sin. Just look at Twitter. (I was not able to import the correct Kali Yuga symbol)